Last month, luxury fashion brand Dolce & Gabbana launched the first-of-its-kind pet perfume for our four-legged companions. The news quickly spread around the world. The brand claims Fefé – as the fragrance mist is called – is alcohol-free and has “delicate notes of ylang-ylang, musk and sandalwood.” I’m no perfume connoisseur, but the news made me gasp and a hint of healthy skepticism filled my brain. Why would a dog need perfume?

In the canine world, a dog’s scent – whatever that may be – is his name and his trademark. A whiff in the air can tell you a lot about a dog if you have a canine nose – his health, his gender, his age, his last meal, his state of mind, his fearfulness or anxiety – which other dogs use to decide how to respond. Why, then, would we want to override the basic essence of canine communication with clues from random herbs or trees? Unlike us, dogs don’t have sweat glands in their coats. A dry, healthy coat contains natural cleansing oils that work with good bacteria to keep the bad, smelly bacteria away. And more importantly, how subtle can the “subtle clues” of perfume be to the nose of a mutt who can smell cancer or narcotics?

Dog perfume may be the latest invention, but the list of trendy, almost unnecessary, and sometimes harmful pet accessories on the market today is long. In the capitalist world we live in, where love is measured by how much someone spends on their loved ones, pet companies are vying for every dollar pet owners are willing to spend on the love of their pets. If you walk into a pet store with a thinking brain, finding a safe, healthy, and necessary pet accessory among thousands of products promising the world can be like looking for a needle in a haystack.

Let’s start with the toy section, which is dominated by nylon chew toys for dogs and squeaky plush toys with polyester fiber filling for cats – both of which promise to banish boredom and keep our pets entertained. They come in fancy colors our pets probably can’t even see, have stereotypical shapes they don’t really care about, and are full of plastic. In a world full of microplastics in our food and air, threatening our health every day, why would anyone intentionally give our beloved pets plastic to chew on? Ropes, stuffed animals, squeaky balls, interactive toys – there are too many things, but they’re all the same – plastic our pets didn’t ask for and don’t need.

The grooming section is another rollercoaster. On one hand, there are shampoos and conditioners for every coat type and breed, which are also infused with all kinds of scents. And that’s not even the worst part. Then there are coloring shampoos and permanent pet hair dyes in vibrant shades of purple, pink, green, blue and yellow! Nature has already created some of the pickiest colors and patterns for dogs and cats with its genes and pigments, and here we create our range based on those. I shudder to think what these products do to our pets’ fur, the skin underneath, and their sensitive noses and eyes. There are also tubes of toothpaste and oral hygiene products, the ingredients of which set off alarm bells upon closer inspection. If you’re hungry for more, you also have nail polish and “paw care” products.

A new trend in recent years is learning push buttons—a series of colored buttons that speak human words when pressed—that you can teach your pets to “communicate and speak” to you. At first glance, this is revolutionary—don’t we all want to speak to our pets in a language we both understand? But look closer and you realize that you have to teach your pet to choose a color that they can press to tell you what they want—a treat, a bathroom break, or that they love you. While this concept initially excited scientists, a recent study shows that by pressing the buttons, dogs are merely responding to their owner’s body language rather than communicating—which defeats the whole purpose of these buttons. If evolution designed cats’ eyes and voice to tug at our heartstrings and really speak, what chance do these buttons have?

This isn’t to say you shouldn’t spend money on your pets, but I do worry that even if you have all the money in the world, finding a safe and healthy toy or accessory for your pet can be a challenge. Unlike human products, the pet market is barely regulated and there’s no real discussion about all the things that go into a pet product. Before you pick out the next trendiest toy or nail color for your furry companion, take a close look at what goes into making the product. Our pets have only us to speak for them. And as for Pippi, broken twigs and birds are perfectly adequate to keep him entertained!

Tailspin is your monthly column on everything heartwarming and annoying about pet ownership.

The author is a science communicator and mother of Pippi, a five-year-old rescued indie dog, who is behind her quest to better understand dogs.

She posts on X @RamanSpoorthy or emails to [email protected]